Ninth Anniversary   Leave a comment

Nine years ago today I was diagnosed with ADHD. The test results said severe Combined Type, but I find that I resonate more with descriptions of what it’s like to be Inattentive Type, so I go with that one. (It’s also the one I get when I do quizzes in ADHD books.)

I was going to tell my diagnosis story, but I think instead I’ll tell you about my life now, nine years after diagnosis. Maybe next year I’ll talk about where I was, but this year I want to talk about where I am.

I am married. We’ll celebrate our fourth wedding anniversary this July, and in October it will be seven years since we met.

I am a housewife. I’m still working on being good at this role, but I’m getting there. Slowly. And it makes me glad.

I am a published author. I had a non-fiction article published in a local magazine (local to Calgary) in 2007 and a short story published in an anthology in 2013.

I am a copyeditor. I’m still working on advertising and getting more clients, but I do this part-time from home and I’m glad I can do it.

I am unmedicated. I have systems in place that help me manage my life, and they work pretty well most of the time. I’ve learned to accept the days when stuff doesn’t pan out and to tweak the system when it becomes obvious that there are bits that just aren’t working for me anymore. (If it becomes apparent that I can’t manage without medication anymore, I will go back to my doctor.)

I am content. Sometimes I’m not so content, but most of the time I like myself as I am, I like where I am in my life, and I am happy with things as they are.

I am disabled. Sure, I have more good days than bad lately, but I’m still severely impaired by ADHD. I struggle with all the same things I’ve always struggled with, from memory to organization to executive function to anxiety to depression to sleep to productivity to procrastination to frustration to perfectionism… the list goes on and on. I still have trouble with timeliness, and I have interesting social moments from time to time.

There’s probably more I could say about where I currently am in my life: things about my spiritual life and my relationships and so on. But these are the things that feel most relevant to my ADHD and the fact that it’s been nine years since I was diagnosed. These are all things that are different about me since my diagnosis (except that last one; I’ve always been disabled). These are all things that have changed because I got diagnosed and got appropriate treatment (which has included counseling, medication, and ADHD coaching at different times, sometimes overlapping).

Other things that have changed for the better: I’m more confident; I don’t feel like I’m barely managing to hold it together anymore; sometimes I actually feel like I have achieved success in my life; and I feel more certain of what I want out of life.

I always had ADHD; the only thing my diagnosis really did was make treatment accessible and give me a place to look for ideas that might help me deal more effectively with my difficulties.

Posted February 12, 2014 by karalianne in Identity

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